Chapter 48: A Choice
They decided to share one last dinner at Mr. Pryde’s house. He asked a friend of his to keep an eye on the Primrose at the dock and then drove the children home to dine on a round piece of bread topped with cheese and circles of red meat that reminded Samantha of her pimples. A pizza, she recalled. “Sorry I can’t make anything fancier,” Mr. Pryde said.
“It’s all right,” Prudence said. She nibbled at her wedge of pizza instead of devouring it as she would have weeks ago. A change attributable to the hideous nightmare caused by Joseph’s potion, but also something else. A glow came off Prudence now, especially in close proximity to Wendell, as she was now at the table. They’re in love, Samantha thought.
She knew the feeling all too well from her time with Joseph. Samantha only hoped Prudence and Wendell’s love turned out better than hers. She looked over to the foot of the table, where Joseph sat, a slice of pizza hanging limp in his hands. Behind his glasses, he looked ready to cry.
“You know, things are usually pretty normal around these parts,” Mr. Pryde said. “Maybe you could come back this summer to see for yourselves. Joseph and I can put you up again.”
Joseph perked up at this, his eyes meeting Samantha’s for a moment before he looked away. “That’s nice of you to offer, but I’m not sure we’ll be able to come back then,” Samantha said. “There’s a lot of work that needs to be done at home.”
“I suppose you’re right. But anytime you want to come back you’re more than welcome,” Mr. Pryde said.
Joseph stood up from the table. “I have to go check on something upstairs,” he said. From the way he hurried out of the dining room and up the stairs, Samantha could tell he was trying not to break down in front of them.
She pushed away from the table. “I think I left something back in my room,” she said. The concern on Prudence and Wendell’s faces made it clear they didn’t believe her.
She knocked on his bedroom door and heard his muffled voice say, “Go away.”
“Joe, it’s me. I didn’t want to leave without saying goodbye to you.” She waited a moment and then the door opened, Joseph’s eyes still puffy and red as he answered the door. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I wish I could stay—”
“So stay. What’s keeping you there? Raising barns and milking cows?”
“It’s complicated,” Samantha said. “Can I come in?” He stepped aside, motioning for her to sit on the bed. He sat down next to her, staring down at the carpet without his glasses. “Things have changed a lot in the last month. There’s so much I don’t understand about myself, about who I am. What I do know is I haven’t been a good person. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I don’t want to lose you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
“Joe, please, I need some time. I need to think things over and decide. This is something I have to do on my own.”
“Why? Whatever you need to think about, I want to be there to help you. I care about you, Samantha.”
She bit down on her lip to keep from bursting into tears. She wanted to stay here with Joseph, wanted to see where life would take them, but she couldn’t. She couldn’t risk doing to him what he had done to her under the potion’s spell. “I’m sorry, Joe. I can’t.”
“Will I see you again?”
“I don’t know.”
Joseph went to his desk and picked up a package wrapped in red paper. He dropped the package beside her on the bed. “I bought this for you the other day.”
“Joseph, I couldn’t accept this—”
“I want you to have it. Please.” She tore the paper off the box to find a tiny black telephone inside. “It’s a cell phone. I didn’t think they had phones in Amish country. See, I wrote my number down in there so you can call me whenever you want. There’s even a battery charger. I did a few modifications so it’ll run on solar power. All you have to do is leave the charger in the sun when the battery runs down. If you ever want to talk, that is.”
Samantha couldn’t hold back the tears now. “Oh, Joseph, thank you so much. I love it.” Their friendly embrace soon turned to a passionate kiss. She wanted to stay there with him forever, but she couldn’t. She couldn’t risk hurting him.
She eased away from Joseph, the package tucked under her arm. She didn’t know what to say, finally blurting out, “Thank you.” Then she hurried out of the room and downstairs, where Prudence and Wendell were waiting.
“Is he coming?” Mr. Pryde asked.
“No,” Samantha said. Mr. Pryde nodded in silent understanding. He ushered them out to the car, where Samantha rode in the front seat so Prudence and Wendell could be together. She hoped Joseph would come bursting out the front door to meet them, but he didn’t. She watched for any sign of him in the rearview mirror until the house disappeared from view. She turned her head just enough so that she saw Wendell take Prudence’s hand.
On the dock, Mr. Pryde thrust his hands into his pocket and stared out at the water. “You kids remember what I said. You’re welcome to come back here anytime.”
“We’ll remember,” Prudence said.
“You all be careful out there.”
“We will,” Wendell said.
“Thank you for everything,” Samantha said. Mr. Pryde continued to stand on the dock, watching them as the Primrose made its way out of the slip, towards open sea. Samantha thought she saw him wave before he disappeared from sight, but she couldn’t be certain.
“Do you think we ever will come back?” Prudence asked.
“I hope so,” Wendell said. Samantha said nothing. She rowed the oars with Wendell until the sail caught a breeze to carry them back to Eternity.
As the Primrose glided along the water, Samantha considered her future. A life with Joseph wasn’t possible, nor could she stay in Eternity. She had been a criminal, a fugitive from justice, and sooner or later that past would resurface as it had when she took Joseph’s potion. Next time she might not just insult Prudence and break her arm; next time Prudence or someone she cared about might end up dead.
She made her decision there in the middle of the sea. After they unloaded the supplies and everyone else went to bed, she would sneak out to the boat and sail away. Not to Seabrooke—never to there again—but to some far distant place where she could live out her days in solitude, isolated so she could never again hurt someone she loved. Prudence and Wendell and Becky and Molly would grieve for her, might even try to find her, but they would get over her departure after a while. They would move on with their lives, as would Joseph. It’s better for everyone this way, she thought.
They reached Eternity as the sun went down, a shadow on the dark water forming into the familiar coastline of the island. “We’re home!” Prudence shouted. She hopped around with such excitement Samantha thought the boat might tip over.
They rowed the Primrose ashore with all three manning an oar, Prudence using her good arm to paddle. They beached the Primrose in the sand and then Wendell jumped down with a rope to secure it to a boulder. Samantha helped Prudence down to the ground before getting off the boat herself. “It’s too bad we couldn’t let them know we were coming,” Wendell said.
“Everyone will be asleep by the time we get there,” Prudence added. “Maybe we should wait.”
“No,” Samantha said too quickly. “We should get this stuff out in case a storm comes up or some animals try to get into it. We wouldn’t want this to all be for nothing.”
Prudence and Wendell agreed. They each took some of the provisions with them as they trudged along the familiar path from the beach into the town. When the church steeple came in sight, Samantha felt a twinge of sadness. This would be the last time she ever saw it.
They stopped by Becky’s cottage first only to find it deserted. “Do you think something happened to them?” Wendell asked, picking up one of Molly’s dolls.
“They’re probably conserving firewood,” Samantha said.
They walked down the silent row of shops to the girl’s dormitory. Before she opened the door, Samantha took a deep breath and tried to force a smile to her face. She didn’t want any of the girls to suspect what she was planning.
“Hello everyone, we’re home,” she called from the parlor. They waited there a moment, a rustling coming from downstairs. Then a head of curly red hair bounded over the stairs and into Samantha’s outstretched arms. “Molly! Oh, you’ve gotten bigger since I left. I don’t think I’ll be able to pick you up soon.”
“Aunt Samantha, I missed you so much,” Molly said.
“I missed you too, sweetie.” She kissed Molly on the forehead, reminding herself this would be the last time she did so. She had to bite down on her lip to keep from crying.
Molly squirmed out of Samantha’s arms to hug Wendell and then Prudence. “What happened to your arm?” she asked.
“It’s a long story,” Prudence said.
By now the other girls had gathered in the parlor, though Samantha didn’t see Becky among them. She picked Molly up again with an exaggerated grunt. “Where’s your mom?” she asked.
Molly looked down at the floor, her face darkening. “Becky is sleeping,” she said.
“We’ll have to wake her up then.”
Molly shook her head. “You can’t. No one can. We tried everything. She won’t wake up.”
“Where is she?” Molly pointed downstairs. Samantha set the girl down before pushing her way through the others to go downstairs. She hurried down the empty rows of beds until she found Annie curled up on her bed. Annie pointed to the opposite corner without Samantha having to say anything.
If not for Annie’s guidance, Samantha might have walked by the pile of blankets in the corner. Only the slight rise and fall of the blankets every few seconds told her someone lay underneath the assorted covers. She laid a hand on the topmost blanket and said, “Becky? Becky, it’s me. It’s Samantha. Can you hear me? We’re back.” When nothing happened, Samantha started to pull off the covers. “Becky, please, wake up.”
She heaped the blankets on the floor, at last revealing the body of a little girl who couldn’t be any older than Molly. Samantha rolled the girl over to see the makeup slathered on her face smeared by tears. “Becky? Is it you?” Samantha asked. “What happened? Who did this to you?”
“She fell into the fountain,” David said from behind her. “That’s at least what Molly says.”
“Is that true?” Samantha asked Molly. The girl nodded and then eased back a few steps until she was standing next to Annie. “How did it happen?”
David recounted the story of Becky visiting the fountain cave to get some water for Molly. A wolf startled her in the cave and she fell into the water. Molly had come along and pulled Becky out, but not before she lost four years. “What about this makeup and the dress?” Samantha asked.
“She and the girls were playing and I guess they got carried away,” David said.
Samantha examined the faces about the room from David’s face to Molly’s petrified face to
“They tortured her,” a small voice said. Samantha looked over at Annie, who seemed more surprised than anyone that she’d spoken. “Helena and Phyllis and the others tied her up and did that to her and then put her in the pantry.”
“Is this true?”
“Yes,” Molly said.
Samantha turned to David. “You knew about this?”
“No, of course not,” he said. When she tried to look him in the eye, his darted away. Her fists clenched as she thought of hitting him in the face. Him first, then
Her hand dropped to her side. She couldn’t do it. She thought of her swollen eye from when Joseph had hit her and then saw Prudence’s arm in its sling. No more violence, she told herself. No more. “We’ll talk about this later,” she said.
She picked Rebecca up and then motioned to Molly. “Come on, let’s get you home.” Before leaving, she stopped in front of David. “We need to get the supplies off the ship. Prudence and Wendell will show you where. Round up everyone and get started. Got it?”
“I got it,” he said. She glared at him an instant, the urge to hit him rising again. No more, she told herself again. She carried Becky upstairs and out into the night.
As she walked to the cottage, a new understanding replaced Samantha’s anger. She could control this rage. She could keep the beast at bay if she tried. She could choose the kind of person she wanted to be.
She set Becky down on her bed in the cottage and then fetched a washcloth to wipe the makeup off the little girl’s face. Something about Becky looked different, but Samantha couldn’t tell what. She leaned down to kiss Rebecca on the forehead like Molly; Rebecca blinked and said, “It’s you.”
“Yes, it’s me. It’s Samantha. I’m back now.”
“Samantha,” Becky whispered. Then her eyes closed. Samantha continued to sit by her bedside through the night. She wouldn’t leave. She would stay to care for these little girls. That was her choice.
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